Thursday, July 21, 2011

Mommy blues!!!

Dear Sakshi,
         It's been ages since I actually thought about starting to write again...its as if something in me had shut down... mostly the creative side of me... at least temporarily...i'm trying to sit down and shovel it out literally, so forgive me if my blog seem to flicker like a candle flame caught in a strong wind...but am not yet ready to wither off...nope!!! Being a mom isn't easy, especially for a person like me who keep questioning every single action of hers...was it this hard for my mom, or is it just that maybe I'm trying too hard...well...i'm not sure...my lil' angel is in his 16th month and yesss! I have successfully transcended the paths of initial burnouts and nervous breakdowns and sleepless nights...His first ever cold,cough,flu,insect bite,fall,teething,pooping,constipation,skin rash,stomach flu and what not! have been conquered, understood and accepted...but each time I went through hell being the panic ridden, nervous mother that I am...;-) and I have realized the hard way that the world does not come to a standstill during such episodes of life, and that i'm not the only other alive in this universe.Actually its not so bad, and no matter whether ur alone or u have help at home, u have got to accept the nuances of life and be sensible and level headed about it...and just march forward pretending to be the strongest soldier in ur clan.Its not gonna come eaasily to u, but in the long run,like all the moms out there,u learn to strike a balance and maybe later on years later,u wud actually be able to think about such panic attacks and laugh out loud and say;"to think I was so silly"!!! I am hoping I wud be able to do just that, but for now I am just a nervous mom!!!